puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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