i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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