obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
she looked like the before picture.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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