...so i touched it.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Randomize
