It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
