Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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