ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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