i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
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