What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
