spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Just cropdusted the office
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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