you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize