I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
