RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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