it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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