you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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