she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
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