I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
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We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
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ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
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