i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize