If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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