I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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