Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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