and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
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Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
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We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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