Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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