Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
