oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Randomize