is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
