Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
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I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
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ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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