That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
