In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
It's blow job season.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
