Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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