I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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