Im at strip club and am horny
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Randomize