Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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