Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
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