You're my little dorito
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
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