Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
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