Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
