He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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