I just gift wrapped bread.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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