Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize