dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
