never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
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I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
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I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
tell me about the eggs
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