I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
They took my balls.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
