i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
