our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
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