Little spoons don't ask big questions
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
