Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
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I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
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Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.