He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
People with herpes should wear stickers.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
