I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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