She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
He kissed a someone with a penis
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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