halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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