no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
