I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
please don't ironically join a cult
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize