So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
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You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
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YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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